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#1
06-09-2010, 04:27 PM
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Naruto - Generation "X"
Naruto – Generation “X” 4:23 PM, May 12th, Present Day Prologue “So, this is how it ends up, eh?” said a white haired man, clutching his chest while looking at the clock on the wall. Afterward his gaze fixed onto the dripping faucet on the sink of the apartment room. His eyes bleak with the scars and scratches around it. Clearly he was a Shinobi. He looked at the man in front of him, “Why?” “Why?” grinned the hooded man. His eyes were shadowed out by the darkness, which was cast from his hood that extended out from his dark cloak. Red clouds spotted the garment. The color was as shady as the man’s identity. “Because,” he continued, “You tried to stop me…” his voice started to drift away. After a moment he continued, “You tried to stop me… back… then… Back then! You tried to stop me!” His voice and anger picked up, whilst his grinned turned into a frown. “Stop you… In the past?” murmured the wounded Shinobi. He looked even harder at the shady character. His vision started to wobble. He squinted to adjust what was left of his poor vision. While looking at the opposing man, his mind raced, trying to recover the vital piece of information. “In the past..?” he murmured again. His age showed as he started to breathe heavily. “I don’t remember.” He said at last. “You don’t?” questioned the other man, his grin returned. “So after a mere ten years you don’t remember me? Oh that’s right… that technique. The forbidden technique to be exact… Kohan Korei no Jutsu, wasn’t it?” His grin slowly changed into a chuckle then into a full out laugh. “Won’t this be a blast from the past?” The crazed man revealed his hands from the insides of the cloak’s sleeves. A silver ring with a red platform with a Kanji inside showed from the man’s right thumb. He put his hands in accordance to that of the Board Handseal. In a short flash of time, he had performed the Monkey, Dog, and Rat handseals as well. The elderly man in front of him gasped in shock, his eyes grew even paler. “Not that… No!” He shouted. “Of course! What other way to finish you?” the Shinobi’s body filled with Chakra. “Kohan Korei no Jutsu!” he shouted. The world around the two dimmed into a grayscale. The clock froze. The elder Shinobi’s eyes naturally blinked. A moment of silence took place as the old man looked around. Everything was still, even the water that had continuously dripped had paused. The man knew what was happening and what was going to happen. He gave a slight grin and softly said, “I remember you now. I said I would always be there for you. I treated you like a son if not a much younger brother. I know you’re Pain… K-” The man started to cough abruptly. Blood started spewing out of his mouth and his knees wobble. His hand on his chest clutched harder. Before he finished his last word, he collapsed. “So you remember sensei?” the remaining Shinobi removed his hood, showing his familiar spiked hair. The color was masked by the technique used beforehand. The man’s cold eyes stared at the corpse in front of him. The clock on the wall started to resume its rotations, however the color did not return. After the first few moments the hands started to pick up in speed until it went rapidly across the template of the clock. The dead elder on the ground started to crumble into dust. After what seemed like a minute, the man on the ground had turned into fragments and dust. On the other side of the room, the clock had started to recommence its normal rotation speed. Last edited by MJM : 06-10-2010 at 12:49 PM. 
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#2
06-09-2010, 10:40 PM
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hmmm intresting i felt like i was in a library reading a book
 very nice will there be more?
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#3
06-10-2010, 02:27 PM
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Quote:
Naruto – Generation “X” Volume One: Konoha Chapter One: Arrival of the Akatsuki “Aw crap! Crap, crap, crap, crap!” a voice shouted hurriedly from the forest. Within a few seconds a brown haired boy with a long blue scarf came out of the forest running. “Crap, crap, crap!” he resumed. Chasing him was a big, black, tusked, boar. The boar was the twice the size of the young man and looked enraged. “No use if I run,” the boy’s attitude changed. “I guess I got to fight it.” From worried to calm, his mood switched. Putting his middle and index fingers into a cross he yelled, “Shadow Clone Jutsu!” Suddenly two copies of the young man emerged from smoke that abruptly appeared on either side of him. “Haaaaa!” The one copy yelled as a war cry when he dashed toward the ferocious beast. The clone jumped and spun in the air for a brief seconds, only to come crashing down with his leg on the pig’s head. While that occurred, the original and the other clone had been hard at working compressing blue Chakra into a spherical shape. A sound of high rotating Chakra chirped from the technique as it formed. The ball of Chakra had been completed and the original boy was holding it, tightly. The copy picked up the original and flung him into the air, toward the boar, then disappeared into smoke. The boar had received an overwhelming hit from the leg of the one copy but it managed to use its strength to push him away, making him disappear as well. However, this gave the remaining boy an opportunity. He thrusted forward and smashed the highly compressed orb into the monstrosity’s head and yelled, “RASENGAN!” The overall force of the boy and compressed Chakra unleashed and the impact bursted the beast back into the forest in which he came from, crushing some trees in the process. The brown haired boy fell back on to the ground safely, panting from his experience with the beast. “Konohamaru! Konohamaru!” a voice called off in the distance. A young Kunoichi with red hair in pigtails that spiked upwards came running into the boy’s view, which was revealed as Konohamaru. “Help! Konohamaru you have to help! Udon, he’s… he’s in trouble!” “Trouble!?” Konohamaru quickly asked, repeating the obvious. “What happened Moegi!? Quick!” “Udon and I were training near the outskirts of the gate,” Moegi explained, “and these three cloaked figures came toward us from the path leading into the Village! One of them used a Jutsu that could disintegrate anything! Udon attacked but it didn’t work! We hid and he told me to find someone! We have to help, I’m not sure if Udon’s okay right now!” “Let’s go…” Konohamaru clenched his fist. He slowly lifted his head up, with a serious expression on his face. <><><> “Izumo, these guys look strong.” A blue spiked haired young man spoke. “Be careful.” “Agreed Kotetsu.” Answered his partner Izumo. “We’ll have to test them…” The young brown haired man flicked several Kunai at the opposing three cloaked men. Their shrouds were pitch-black with the exception of the crimson clouds on them. One of the shrouded men pulled out his hand, forming a one handed handseal. “Hokai no Jutsu!” he chanted. In a moment’s notice the Kunai projecting toward him and his partners disintegrated into purple sparkle-like particles. “What the hell was that!?” questioned the confused Kotetsu. “His Jutsu… it dissolved your Kunai!” “I saw…” Izumo said softly, gulping. Sweat had started to form on his forehead and temples. “If he can do that… Could he…” the worried Shinobi gulped again, “Could he dissolve… us?” His partner’s eyes widened, Kotetsu had suddenly been stricken with fear for his precious life. “Hmm? So you wish to know?” the terror-striking man said. “Here it is…” He lifted the handseal again. “Hito Hokai no Ju-?” A thrown kunai interrupted the man. “What the? ****, it’s a bomb!” The kunai had a paper tag wrapped around it, which caught on fire in a second after it landed. In a matter of seconds the rigged weapon exploded, causing a minor burst, hitting only the Akatsuki, leaving the Leaf Ninja time to regroup. “Who threw that?” Izumo questioned curiously, hoping it was a fellow leaf Ninja, he looked at the direction from where the weapon was thrown. It was none other than the brown-haired young Ninja known as Udon standing atop a tree. “Hurry Izumo, we have to do something!” Udon called as he jumped down from the tree. Landing perfectly, he held up a handseal. “Let’s go!” The other two Shinobi did the same. “Water Style!” Izumo inhaled, “Syrup Trap!” A pond of sticky liquid bursted out of the Shinobi’s mouth, surrounding the Akatsuki. “Now!” The Shinobi focused Chakra to his feet so he could be mobile in the liquid. “Summoning Jutsu!” Kotetsu revealed a scroll, unwinding it. In a flash a cloud of smoke appeared leaving behind a giant crustacean-like club. “Hya!” He pelted the club toward the smoke that covered the Akatsuki. “Fire Style!” Udon inhaled as well, “Fireball Jutsu!” A stream of fire emerged from the young Genin’s mouth, forming into a ball of flames when it reached the area of the Akatsuki. “This should work!” Commented Kotetsu. “They have no where to go, plus their getting hit physically and non-physically. They couldn’t have escaped our attacks! There’s no way out! In happiness, he scavenged out several shuriken and pelted them at the foes as well. “No way out?” a familiar voice said from behind the three Shinobi. The three Leaf Ninja’s eyes widened with fear and awe. “We were out before the explosion of your Paper Bomb reached us. Heh.” The three terrified Ninja slowly turned around, hoping they were just hearing things. However this proved to be false. The three Akatsuki members had somehow escaped behind them. Their faces still hidden under their hoods. “Now, let’s show you what your attacks actually hit.” The other masked member said. The cloud of smoke that had once shrouded the Akatsuki member’s original positions lifted. In the midst of the slowly rising smoke, two bodies were silhouetted. As the smoke thinned out, there stood the burned and injured bodies of two young Genin. Konohamaru and Moegi.
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#4
06-10-2010, 03:47 PM
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 epic
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#5
06-10-2010, 05:11 PM
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Quote:
1) More developed feedback that either explains ways I can improve or something you liked about the Chapter. 2) More readers. Please, if you read it also post. It helps make writing a lot more... fun I suppose. Ask any great Fan Fic Writer and they'll pretty much reply in the same way.
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#7
06-12-2010, 06:20 PM
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Nice, are going to make cards for your FF
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#9
06-12-2010, 06:24 PM
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what do you want me to elaborate
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